To experience that day after day, for me at least, is worth suffering for ... and even dying for.But for a moment, when the car arrived 5:59pm, I felt that panicked sensation once again. My life is over if I step into that car. My heart raced as it pulled to the curb. I nearly turned around and walked away before I heard his voice. It was Alex. He stepped around from behind the car and opened the door for me."I was afraid you might get cold feet."Alex said with a big smile.My mind went blank again. I smiled back and stepped inside the SUV.That's it. I'm done. I'm fucking finished.Alex reached over and pat me on the shoulder. "I bet you are excited." He said grinning. "I have to say that envy is a relatively unfamiliar emotion for me ... but today, I'm genuinely envious of you."His eyebrows raised. "How about a glimpse of what you've got to look forward to?" He gripped a large laptop out of his briefcase, twisted it open, and handed it to me. As the page loaded, he pulled down the. I would wash it out later. After cleaning and oiling the bores, and wiping the pistols down to remove any residual black powder residue, I reassembled the pistols. The cylinder with two empty chambers was reloaded after it was replaced in its pistol.I was finished in a short time and undressed to shower, as Chanthra was already finished. The water in the jar was semi warm but not too bad to shower with. After showering I put on clean underwear, and then prepared for bed after brushing my teeth. There were no real dentist in this time period, and we needed to take good care of our teeth.After opening the window and blowing out the oil lamp, I joined Chanthra in bed. She had a sarong on and cuddled up against me. It was very nice to have an actual mattress and pillows to sleep on, and this sweet young woman here in bed with me. I wasn't quite ready for sleep just yet, however."I don't believe that it was an accident that we were attacked returning from the Wat," I told Chanthra after.
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